You have a small team, several people rock, you can rely on them and like working with them, but there's a couple you find really hard to connect with and, ahem, actually like.
They go around you, their way of working confuses you, and they seem to make things difficult. Their facial expressions in meetings trigger you, and you spend time daydreaming what it would be like to 'manage' them out of the business and get in 'better' people of your choice.
There's no quick fix, AND here are three things to think about that might make an early difference.
🤔 Get it's your job to do what you need to do to make this work. Being a leader is being good at developing functioning working relationships. You don't have to be besties; you do have to make it a project. SO quit the daydreaming and get on it; it'll be worth it.
😶 Be careful about your comms. In an effort not to betray your true feelings, you may find yourself holding back when hard messages have to be delivered. You'll come over as ineffective, possibly a bit flakey and give them ammo for why you're not a good leader.
🤓 Get a mature ally in the business i.e. someone who won't join you in a bitch fest about those people. You want to be able to bounce around your thoughts, understand where you are triggered (so what's your stuff), and come out with fresh thinking on how you might approach the situations.
And finally - you know that you can't have a team full of people just like you, that leads to seriously dodgy decision making - so embrace the diversity of thinking these people bring and pay attention to them. You may be spot on, and they're not right for the business, or actually, you may discover they are just what you need.
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